slemslempike: (nemi: argh)
This is from last week, so apologies if you've already seen it, but this is the Hansard report of the Lords' same-sex marriage debate where several noble friends create RPF about George Clooney:

As the law stands, if I was married to George Clooney and he was to have a sexual affair with, say, the noble Baroness, Lady Thornton, that would be adultery. If I was married to George Clooney and Mr Clooney had sexual relations with the noble Lord, Lord Alli, that would not be adultery because he would not be able to do the sexual act which is very specifically defined in law. Should I wish to divorce Mr Clooney on those grounds, I would do so on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour. In future, if the noble Lord, Lord Alli, was to marry Mr Clooney, and Mr Clooney was to have an affair with me—and who would blame him in those circumstances?—that would be adultery and the noble Lord, Lord Alli, should he choose to, would be able to divorce Mr Clooney on those grounds. If the noble Lord, Lord Alli, were married to Mr Clooney and Mr Clooney had an affair with, say, my noble friend Lord Black of Brentwood—

Lord Black of Brentwood: Hear, hear!

Baroness Stowell of Beeston: That would not be adultery, but the noble Lord, Lord Alli, would be able to divorce Mr Clooney, should he choose to, on the grounds of unreasonable behaviour.

I am particularly fond of "should he choose to", indicating that it would take an awful lot of straws before you got to the final one that would rend such a partnership asunder.

April books

Jul. 9th, 2012 12:23 pm
slemslempike: (Default)
Apparently I never got around to posting about what I read in April, so here are two non-consecutive months' worth.

April Books
Come Hither, Nurse! - Jane Grant
The Finkler Question - Howard Jacobson
Exchanges of Hearts - Janet Quin-Harkin (Sweet Dreams)
No More Boys - Charlotte White (Sweet Dreams)
The Lark on the Wing - Elfrida Vipont
The Spring of the Year - Elfrida Vipont
Flowering Spring - Elfrida Vipont
The Pavilion - Elfrida Vipont
The Story of Horace - Alice M. Coates
The Summer Jenny Fell in Love - Barbara Conklin (Sweet Dreams)
Penny and Aggie
Mr Wonderful - Fran Michaels (Sweet Dreams)
The Cinderella Game - Sheri Cobb South (Sweet Dreams)

April books. )
slemslempike: (Default)
I am reading The Maker's Mask by Ankaret Wells (and really enjoying it - highly recommended especially as it's only £3ish for the Kindle edition). Ligeia has murmured "I will lift up my eyes to the Spires, from whence comes my help". Ha! Here's hoping that Tzenni soon discovers a perfectly normal echo and takes to singing into it. (Though she seems more likely to run an experiment about it.)
slemslempike: (Default)
I was in a charity shop and the women behind the till were talking about Canada. One of them's father had grown up on Prince Edward Island, and the other woman had never heard of Anne of Green Gables. She had, however, been to Canada:

"We desperately wanted to see a Mountie, but we only saw one the entire time, and that was a woman."
"Oh dear. Well, I suppose they have to let them, nowadays."
"Yes, but I've never been so disappointed."

Oh my god I don't have a Due South icon.
slemslempike: (Default)
Really, there was a time when this ad wasn't too creepy to use?

ETA2: Sorry! I've just realised some people might need to know that the link below contains COCK. And those who don't need to might well like to.

I like the series of "men at their most masculine" pictures, and this makes me laugh and laugh and laugh. "Because when you study Freud you don't let him study you."

ETA: Ooh! And I've gone up to 386th on prolific.


Sep. 5th, 2009 10:16 pm
slemslempike: (sharpe: whorse)
A link and a thought about men. )

And I like this poem: pick-up lines for feminists, which I saw linked in Bitch's feminist joke contest. (Sadly they have not yet got many good comments - I think the joke about waves is particularly poor, but I do like the masturbating one.) Anyone who says this:

your feet must be tired.
because you have been
running through my
mind and struggling
against the repressive
gender roles
that we have been
socialized into
all day.

to me is pretty much guaranteed a patriarchy-subverting consensual sexual encounter of a mutually satisfying nature to be determined through a fair and transparent system of democratic decision-making.

I went to the theatre in Manchester. )


Aug. 22nd, 2009 09:41 pm
slemslempike: (Default)
The British Optical Association Museum calls itself a musEYEum! I am very pleased indeed. Furthermore, they are "open to the public most week days and we are delighted that you would like to come and see us". Bless.

I have also decided that anything with an admission fee of over £5 is optional. Up to that amount I am happy to pay even if I don't personally have an interest, in order to support this our nation's priceless heritage etc. I am not, however, paying FIFTEEN POUNDS to see The British Music Experience, even if it does have Humph's VE day trumpet.

Tidying derailed by urgent need to make an Access database of museums in London with address, opening hours and admission price. Because if I don't do it now I won't know which to prioritise while I have weekdays free.
slemslempike: (feminsm: Girl Power)
I clearly haven't been keeping up with the latest trends in feminism:

Generational Feminism, by Jan Bowen, according to Dymocks.
slemslempike: (jump: Oooh)
From Jezebel (where else?):

My usual "sophisticated" sense of humour has clearly abandoned me in my weakened state. Ham! Shaped like a penis!

That Mitchell and Webb Look is on again tonight, which I am looking forward to. Last week I unexpectedly laughed myself silly at the Gary Rhodes sketch.

Earlier today we watched Make It or Break It, the new gymnastics TV drama from the US, and it was GREAT. There was gymnastics, obviously, with brilliant cuts between the faces and the actual bodies during their moves. There was a bitchy gymnast who'll happily fuck over her friends to get to the top, a perfect very-in-control gymnast whose only ambitions are to do gymnastics, and a more friendly gymnast who was having an ILLICIT RELATIONSHIP WITH A BOY. There is also a new gymnast, who is a threat, and her leotards are STORE-BOUGHT. The other gymnasts' leotards are not store-bought. They come through sponsorship deals, and they are SO VERY GLITTERY. Dr Malachi from ER was the coach. There were dirty deeds and the wonderful triumph of the will over the weakness of the flesh. I cannot WAIT for the rest of the series. (Before its cancellation, probably.) ALSO why did no-one tell me they were making a TV series of 10 Things I Hate About You? I love that film.

Is there some sort of add-on that will automatically uncollapse the threads on IMDB?
slemslempike: (x: Miss Tic)

Yesterday I did a bit of work (but not enough) then was summoned back home by the promise to play Trivial Pursuit, which happened, and I won. Then I left the others alone for FIVE MINUTES and returned to find an evening of TNG ahead of me, with occasional interludes of despair at the impending doom of the entire world. I tried to read and found myself counting how many words on each line of text instead. This is not a pleasing development.

Today started promisingly by finding my phone under a cushion, discovering my house keys had been found at the sports centre, and then enjoying a near-empty pool entirely devoid of fuckwits. I am hoping to fulfill this promise by not only meeting my deadline today, but doing so with a piece of work that is not utterly shit. I intend to get on that right away, but first - the wisdom of Dr Alexander Gunn. )the wisdom of Dr Alexander Gunn. )
slemslempike: (discworld: can't be having)
More amusing but in no way justifiable annotations in library books:

Bitter, meet smug. )

Also, I bought this badge in Stockholm:

Yay! I don't really know what it actually means (my friend thought that it was something about a grand slam), but to me it just means that I have a klubb. A club of FIRE and GRAPES, and a WEIRD BUTTON THING.
slemslempike: (girlsown: rosalie)
The Ladybird Book of the Police.

I skimmed idly by at first, thinking it was just someone posting pictures for us to see the style that old ladybird books used to have. (I used to do work that involved cataloguing them, the old ones were really lovely.) Then I suddenly registered that the text was not quite what I would expect...

It is freshers week. So far I have seen them queueing to register in the library, and watching large men set fire to office equipment in the square. The lack of a reading room is my procrastinatory excuse du jour.

I really love today's xkcd.
slemslempike: (Default)
ARGH. I have only one week before my work presentation, and so I have therefore been amusing myself on one of the few websites that isn't blocked, The Guardian's Notes and Queries section.

My favourite questions and responses. )

I'm planning to go and see Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging tonight. The trailers leave me hopeful that my love of the books will not be undermined.
slemslempike: (Default)
Earlier this week I read an article called 'An unusual pessary of dough and cocaine'. I thought that this was pretty much going to be the pinnacle of my article-reading day. Not so. In the same issue of that very journal:

Might not be work safe, depending on your work... )

Other stuff )
slemslempike: (x: Raised Eyebrow)
From the pen of Dr Alexander Gunn, author of The Privileged Adolescent: An outline of the physical and mental problems of the student society, published by the Medical and Technical Publishing Co, in 1970.

I have so far only read the chapter on "Sex on the campus", because that is naturally what interested me in the first place. Here, we learn that, on university campuses:
"promiscuity (OED = 'indiscriminate mixture') as by definition girls who cohabit with more than one partner in, say, any one year, is agin less than 1 per cent. Indeed, promiscuity in the sense of the girl who 'sleeps around' is seen by university physicians as a sign and symptom of psychological disturbance - the girl is invariably, quite severely emotionally disturbed and her sexual behaviour is but one aspect of her illness." (35)

Then there is "a detailed survey carried out by the author" in which "an attempt was made to definte the social and psychological attitudes of those female students who were...regular users of the 'pill'." (35-36) I bet he carried that survey out. I bet it was very detailed indeed. Perhaps a phone survey, with most of the questions replaced by heavy breathing.

"With regard to domicile, it does not seem to make any significant difference as to whether the girl lives in lodgings, hostel or flat as to whether she uses an oral contraceptive or not." (37)

My god! They'll do it anywhere!

And, finally, I regret to inform you that "[there] is no satisfaction to be had from promiscuity beyond the spinal reflexes" (41) NONE WHATSOEVER. (Yes, I know what he means by spinal reflexes. But it amuses me to suppose that he doesn't. Also he says that these spinal reflexes are "rare" in young women.)

I wish this counted as work.
slemslempike: (x: cheerleader)
Wednesday - theatre bad manners )

The Lover/The Collection )

The Unbelievable Truth recording )

Thursday - How to choreograph a sensitive cheerleading routine post 9/11 )

Snowbound )

Liberty is the freedom not to wear plastic coils on my clothing )

Friday: work, fun work, Jane Bond )

This weekend I lay around on the sofa watching snooker. This week I have far too much work to do.

* Poor Humph, I hope he is getting better.
slemslempike: (Default)
Last Friday I braved the train chaos and went to Preston to see [ profile] nerdcakes and Juno. I was panicking because of the train CHAOS and ended up getting us to the cinema about an hour too early. We were going to go to Chiquito's so that I could have fried ice cream, but apparently everyone else had that idea too, so instead I dragged Sarah reluctantly to KFC because every time that awful advert about mum's night off has been on recently I have wanted their chicken, or more specifically the skin from their chicken. Now that I have had it I won't want it again for several years.

Juno )

On Saturday I went down to Manchester, where I had the nicest roast beef I have ever eaten in my entire life, along with roast carrots and beetroot and the best potato wedges of recent memory, and went to reclaim the night with [ profile] irrtum. I was getting anxious about it, because as I have said I generally don't enjoy the marches, but this was really good, actually. They kept the chants going well enough that I didn't worry about it, and was able to join in as well. I didn't notice any negative reactions, and plenty of people clapping us as we went by. It had two sections - women-only march (including transwomen) at the front, and mixed supporters bringing up the rear. I think it was a really good way of doing it, and it worked well - about 400 people, I think they said on the f-word (where I also appear in severe profile in some pictures they posted). It was also shorter than London, and not as slow-moving, which is always a plus for lazy me. We marched past the very Spar where I went for help a few years ago after I'd been attacked, which also made the whole thing more meaningful for me.

We skipped the rally though, and went to see Margot at the Wedding instead. Then we went back to Rachel's and ate french fancies for supper and then for breakfast. In the afternoon we went to see My Blueberry Nights. Films. )

On Tuesday I went to a Fair Trade comedy thing with [ profile] nerdcakes, who is great to go to comedy things with because she will cheer for things she likes even if no-one else does. I am always cowardly and wait to see if other people are making noise before venturing any noise of even moderate committal. This time she cheered for both Liverpool and Fair Trade fortnight, which are actually good things to cheer for.

Just Fair Laughs )

Today I went to see Banter being recorded, which I really enjoyed. The series starts in April, and I'm not sure where this comes in.

Banter recording )

It ended at 19.20, which meant that, despite an uncomfortably full bladder, I had to set off at top speed to Euston to try and catch the Last Train. I was successful, and in fact had to loiter while thinking of deserts, crackers and the like until they put up the platform.

More words

May. 14th, 2007 05:30 pm
slemslempike: (games: scrabble)
I spent the afternoon in the reading room at the library trying to absorb Butler's argument in Bodies that Matter. While I in no way back down from my stance that people who write in library books, even in pencil, should be forcibly tattooed with THOUGHTLESS IDIOT, these bits did amuse me:

I don't think the darling is sincere )

And what better framing device for my own list of words I have looked up recently. There are rather fewer than before because I have been reading less of anything, and nothing of Will Self.

Brumaire - Second month of the French revolutionary calendar - the month of mist (October/November)
internecine - mutually destructive conflict
cynosure - a centre of attraction
cicisbeo - admirer of a married woman / knot of ribbon on a fan
labile - unstable, easily changing
paramnesias - false memory
antebellum - period preceding American Civil War
inchoate - not yet completed
aphasia - inability to use or understand language
Keratin - primary protein of hair, skin, nails
Chlamys - short woollen cloak
tabouret - low upholstered stool
colonnade - row of columns
quinquet lamp - where oil resevoir is higher than the flame (apparently same as Argand lamp?)
monism - doctrine that all things are part of the same reality
mimetic - reflective of reality

And other things I've learnt from books:
Sadza is a dish of grain meal, mbodza is underdone/inedible food.
After reading Berlant, who talked about "the cliche that queers are light in the loafers", I am introduced to a new term, which is apparently meant to be about mincing? Anyway. That was a new thing I learned.

With regard to the last post, as you may have worked out from other people's answers, the offical flower of the United Staes is... the rose. Which, apart from being blatant copying (it's totally ours! We had a war of them and everything!), is not a flower I associate with America in the slightest.

I have been trying to learn things about history as well. I made a chart with British monarchs, prime ministers, US presidents, French kings/presidents and Russian Emperors/leaders. 1710-1949. I'm never going to remember any of them, but it did lead to a pleasant Sunday colouring things in. There is not nearly enough colouring in in my life at the moment.

Henry Pelham was succeeded as Prime Minister in 1754 by his brother, the Duke of Newcastle-upon-Tyne. FACT.
slemslempike: (x: crying hobby)
I was looking at the website for the British Humanist Association (trying to work out what humanism is, after thinking about a post that[ profile] lsugaralmond made), and found this part of their quiz hilarious:

5 When I look at a beautiful view I think that …
A) it must have been designed by God.
B) it would be a nice place for a motorway.
C) this is what life is all about - I feel good.
D) we ought to do everything possible to protect this for future generations.

My general reaction to beautiful views is "oh, that's nice", so I'm probably up there with the unsustainable-transport-planners in many people's eyes. I don't tend to be moved by scenery, although hedgerows do bring out an occasional patriotic murmur. I'm thinking that the BHA is not the place for me, based on that.

Today I finshed The Archaeology of Knowledge. The main outcome of this is that I can now say that I've read The Archaeology of Knowledge, as long as it's in a situation where there will be absolutely NO follow-up questions. Tomorrow will be spent going through the spark notes guide to work out what it actually means. I made an icon from the phdcomic feed, because it seems that it's going to become useful very soon , and I thought that if I needed to make a post and illustrate it with an icon of despair, it would only be exacerbated if I had to make the icon as well. It was mostly in Photoshop, but I couldn't work out how to do a border, so I saved it and then did the border in Paint.

This time next month I'll be in Africa.
slemslempike: (Default)
An anteater walks into a bar and says that he'd like a drink. "Okay," says the bartender. "How about a beer?" "Noooooooooo," replies the anteater. "Then how about a gin and tonic?" "Noooooooooo." "A martini?" "Noooooooooo." Finally, the bartender gets fed up and says, "Hey, listen buddy, if you don't mind me asking - why the long no's?"


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