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I might be an atheist, but I'm not stupid.
Dec. 1st, 2005 11:25 pmI went to see Stewart Lee in Morecambe with ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
jekesta. alicamel didn't want to come, we didn't just abandon her cruelly or anything. We got successfully to the Platform (thanks in large part to my navigational talents, I think you'll find), and thne we bought tickets from people who weren't really keen on the concept. It's like they'd never really thought that this moment would happen to them. Then we went to the pub next door and bought drinks and food after ascertaining that they could be delivered within the 40 minutes we had to spare. They could, and the man also tried to sell us on Baileys chocolate cups, which is a shot of Baileys, delivered to you in a chocolate cup. We had noticed the sign for them while he was pouring coke, and he had clearly heard us exclaiming about the possibilities of such a thing. But Jen was driving, and I am still ill, so we did not. But I have remembered about them for another time. I had a steak, but very quickly realised that possibly I shouldn't be eating at all, so I kept eating for a little while just to make sure, and decidedperhaps best not. But no mishaps came from that, thankfully.
The Platform is the old Morecambe train station. It's really sad, as now they just have the one platform, although you can get to Leeds direct from it, which is quite good. But this one is huge and has a glass roof - a roof at all is just thumbing its nose at the new station - and signs for Bolton and Sheffield and adverts for new trains. The bit where people perform is just a large hall, with the acoustics, as Stewart Lee reamarked, of a train station. It's rather peculiar. There weren't very many people there, about fiftyish, maybe a bit more, and sat in small groups around chairs in a rather sad attempt at cabaret style.
The support act was a man apparently called Steven Carling, in which case it's a pity he never learnt how to pronounce his name properly so that people might know what it is and not have to go to Stewart Lee's website to found out. He was a SNOOKER COMEDIAN. He mentioned snooker at every conceivable opportunity, talking about naming hurricanes "Higgins" and the confusion that might lead to, pointing out that the problem with America is that it's never produced a world champion snooker player, unlike Canada, and then a man in the audience (who later proved to be a complete wanker, sadly), showed off all his knowledge of Cliff Thorburn, also known as "The Grinder". That bit rather passed me by, but I understood almost all that he said! He did a bit about Reservoir Dogs and how you shouldn't be ashamed to be Mr Pink because it's the highest scoring ball in the absence of Mr Black, even taking into account the thingy with calling any other ball a red if you need to. Which I totally understand. He said "you may be asking why I'm wearing a diving watch in a non-aquatic venue" and a man at the front put his hand up to offer an opinion. Steven Carling said it was the politest heckle ever. Then later he asked Bernard (for that was the polite heckler) what his favourite film was, in order that he could ignore what he actually said and say "Reservoir Dogs" and get a laugh, but Bernard's favourite film is Pulp Fiction, and no-one really laughed because of it being the same director and appearing more like a mistake than an actual joke type situation.
Do you know Stewart Lee? He was a double thing with Richard Herring in Fist of Fun and This Morning With Richard Not Judy (oh, and in the absence of Richard to do the things he normally does he says them himself or pretends the audience has and you can so tell which bits they are) and he co-wrote and directed Jerry Springer the Opera which made him the focus of a right wing evangelical Christian hate campaign and nearly landed him in court for blasphemy. So, he is funny, and intelligent, and Controversial, but in a proper making you think way rather than the new-fangled way of Being Controversial, which is an apparent euphemism for Being Shit in a New Way.
( You may well think he is actually shit, which is fine, and I'll cut it because it is offensive. Not even might be. But it's offensive deliberately and intelligently and in context. But since you weren't there for the context, you can skip this if you prefer. You may well have needed to be there. )
jekesta. alicamel didn't want to come, we didn't just abandon her cruelly or anything. We got successfully to the Platform (thanks in large part to my navigational talents, I think you'll find), and thne we bought tickets from people who weren't really keen on the concept. It's like they'd never really thought that this moment would happen to them. Then we went to the pub next door and bought drinks and food after ascertaining that they could be delivered within the 40 minutes we had to spare. They could, and the man also tried to sell us on Baileys chocolate cups, which is a shot of Baileys, delivered to you in a chocolate cup. We had noticed the sign for them while he was pouring coke, and he had clearly heard us exclaiming about the possibilities of such a thing. But Jen was driving, and I am still ill, so we did not. But I have remembered about them for another time. I had a steak, but very quickly realised that possibly I shouldn't be eating at all, so I kept eating for a little while just to make sure, and decidedperhaps best not. But no mishaps came from that, thankfully. The Platform is the old Morecambe train station. It's really sad, as now they just have the one platform, although you can get to Leeds direct from it, which is quite good. But this one is huge and has a glass roof - a roof at all is just thumbing its nose at the new station - and signs for Bolton and Sheffield and adverts for new trains. The bit where people perform is just a large hall, with the acoustics, as Stewart Lee reamarked, of a train station. It's rather peculiar. There weren't very many people there, about fiftyish, maybe a bit more, and sat in small groups around chairs in a rather sad attempt at cabaret style.
The support act was a man apparently called Steven Carling, in which case it's a pity he never learnt how to pronounce his name properly so that people might know what it is and not have to go to Stewart Lee's website to found out. He was a SNOOKER COMEDIAN. He mentioned snooker at every conceivable opportunity, talking about naming hurricanes "Higgins" and the confusion that might lead to, pointing out that the problem with America is that it's never produced a world champion snooker player, unlike Canada, and then a man in the audience (who later proved to be a complete wanker, sadly), showed off all his knowledge of Cliff Thorburn, also known as "The Grinder". That bit rather passed me by, but I understood almost all that he said! He did a bit about Reservoir Dogs and how you shouldn't be ashamed to be Mr Pink because it's the highest scoring ball in the absence of Mr Black, even taking into account the thingy with calling any other ball a red if you need to. Which I totally understand. He said "you may be asking why I'm wearing a diving watch in a non-aquatic venue" and a man at the front put his hand up to offer an opinion. Steven Carling said it was the politest heckle ever. Then later he asked Bernard (for that was the polite heckler) what his favourite film was, in order that he could ignore what he actually said and say "Reservoir Dogs" and get a laugh, but Bernard's favourite film is Pulp Fiction, and no-one really laughed because of it being the same director and appearing more like a mistake than an actual joke type situation.
Do you know Stewart Lee? He was a double thing with Richard Herring in Fist of Fun and This Morning With Richard Not Judy (oh, and in the absence of Richard to do the things he normally does he says them himself or pretends the audience has and you can so tell which bits they are) and he co-wrote and directed Jerry Springer the Opera which made him the focus of a right wing evangelical Christian hate campaign and nearly landed him in court for blasphemy. So, he is funny, and intelligent, and Controversial, but in a proper making you think way rather than the new-fangled way of Being Controversial, which is an apparent euphemism for Being Shit in a New Way.
( You may well think he is actually shit, which is fine, and I'll cut it because it is offensive. Not even might be. But it's offensive deliberately and intelligently and in context. But since you weren't there for the context, you can skip this if you prefer. You may well have needed to be there. )
